Having adjusted to my new home and the many activities that I pursue there, I looked out my window and noticed that there were many places outside the fabulous Duck Pond Estate. In fact, there were a good many fascinating places to go and things to do. With this in mind, I raced out to the parking lot to look for my car. It was at this point that I realized that I do not HAVE a car. This caused me to think in earnest about finding a way to go to the many fascinating places outside my home. I turned on the T.V. and munched some delicious Cheez-Its, which is an ideal method of thinking about things. I saw a commercial for RTA, which is the Regional Transportation Authority in the greater Cleveland area, along with some not-so-great areas. They suggested that I could go to all the fascinating places I wanted by RIDING THE BUS! I realized that this could be my most exciting and dangerous adventure yet! It is important to be prepared when riding the bus, so I did careful research. To begin with, you must have a destination. I decided to go to my friend's house, because she usually has a pretty tasty lunch and snacks for me when I go there. I called the RTA and told them I wanted to go to my friend's house on the bus. This is where it gets tricky, because you actually have to tell them the name of the street where your friend lives, and sometimes you have to tell them the name of the cross street, too, because they don't know the names of all the little streets. They also need to know where you live so they can tell you which bus will come and get you. The friendly recorded message told me exactly what bus I would need to ride and even told me what time it would leave my street! Armed with this information, I was ready to begin my adventure. I knew I would need supplies for this long and probably highly dangerous journey, so I got out my little tote bag with the purple flowers on it, and packed carefully: Thermos of coffee, deck of playing cards, Stephen King novel, cherry Life Savers, a clean pair of underwear and a box of Cheez-Its in case I got hungry. I also brought some money, which is important, because they won't let you ride the bus if you don't give them the money. Thus prepared, I walked to the bus stop, conveniently located right in the middle of a really big mud puddle. About 25 minutes later, the bus actually arrived only about 15 minutes late. I hardly noticed the time passing, as I was fascinated by the other people who were also waiting for the bus. I found out that you should never actually look at people who are waiting for the bus, because if you do, they will ask you for things, like cigarettes or spare change. If you do accidentally look at one of them, smile and nod and look away really fast before they have time to ask you for things. When the bus arrives, the driver will let you climb up the steps and give him the money. If you need to ride more than one bus, you have to ask the driver for a transfer, or you will have to give the money all over again on the next bus. Once you have given the money, the bus will pull away from the curb at about 42 miles per hour so that you can experience the effects of gravity. There are lots of metal bars all over the bus to better conduct the gravity, but I used one to hang on to instead. It felt kind of gooey, which is stuff I think they out on the metal bars to make the bus more aerodynamic. I found an empty seat and prepared to have a tasty Cheez-It snack while riding along. Unfortunately, there was a sign that said, "No eating or drinking on the bus." I guess the gravity would make eating Cheez-Its just too dangerous, so I put away my tasty snack. The bus driver was a very friendly man who goes by the name of "Suicide Marvin," which is just a nickname, as he didn't actually kill himself or anybody else while driving the bus that day. He was very pleasant to the passengers, many of whom have never done jail time, and was very cheerful as he told us that the heater was broken and we should just maybe keep our gloves and hats on for this trip. He was very kind as he told us that he had no bus schedules for this bus, but had all kinds of schedules for the bus over on the other side of town that nobody ever rides anyway. He was very concerned when he almost ran over the lady who foolishly believed that the red light meant he would stop for her. After the long ride, I saw my friend's street, and pulled the little cord that is supposed to ding and light up a sign for the driver that says "Stop Requested." It didn't ding, and the little light didn't go off, but the driver was kind enough to stop and let me off the bus three blocks later after I ran up to the door and said "That was my stop back there!" I got off the bus feeling victorious, and slightly queasy from the gravity, but proud that I had accomplished the dangerous and exciting adventure of riding the bus! When I got to my friend's house, I asked if she would give me a ride home. A ducky such as myself can only take so much adventure in one day!